Some stories are told with words. Others are told with footsteps. Every November since 2011, Stephen Younger tells a powerful story by participating in Susan G Komen’s 3-day, 60-mile walk. This incredible commitment is his living cancer tribute—a way to honor a legacy and fuel the search for a cure. Events like this annual breast cancer walk show us how personal memorials can become powerful movements. They are about transforming love and loss into action, ensuring the people we miss are never, ever forgotten.

He travels from his Riverside, California house to participate in walks around the country – from San Diego to Boston - in the hopes that others won’t have to go through the pain and suffering that his wife, Karen, and their family went through.

She passed away on Dec. 29, 2017,14 years after being diagnosed with breast cancer.

“It’s too late for my wife, but it’s not too late for somebody else,” says Younger man. “Ultimately, I can sit back and say something needs to be done about it, or I can do something about it. I want to know that another family won’t have to go through what we have gone through.’

No matter who you are, breast cancer probably has touched your life.

In 2019, close to 270,000 new cases of breast cancer will be diagnosed in women in the U.S. alone. One in eight women in the United States will be diagnosed with breast cancer in her lifetime.

Breast cancer is the most common cancer diagnosed in women, and the second-leading cause of cancer death among women, according to the American Cancer Society.

These are daughters, sisters, girlfriends, wives, mothers, aunts and mothers-in-law. They are sons, brothers, boyfriends, husbands, fathers, uncles and father-in-laws.

During the month of October, National Breast Cancer Awareness Month is an important time to educate women and men about breast cancer, including symptoms and warning signs, factors that impact a person’s breast cancer risk and the importance of speaking with your doctor about what screening is right for you for cancer prevention.

It is also a time when people who want to make a difference can find a variety of ways to get involved, raise awareness and engage, from volunteering to raising funds needed to support those living with the disease today while also searching for tomorrow’s cures.

“While it is important to help people access quality care today, research is critical for developing new, more effective treatments,” said Kimberly A. Sabelko, Ph.D., senior director of Scientific Strategy & Programs at Susan G. Komen.

Held in more than 100 communities nationwide, Susan G. Komen’s Race for the Cure and MORE THAN PINK Walk are inspiring family-friendly events that joins participants of all ages and abilities, coming together as one, and remembering those we’ve lost, celebrating those that have survived, honoring those currently living with the disease and uniting as a community.

They are an opportunity to come together as a community, while raising funds for patient advocacy, breast cancer treatment and lifesaving research.

Through its Snapshots of Hope initiative, the National Breast Cancer Foundation encourages people to share their stories about how they are someone they love have been affected by breast cancer. Those stories are shared through the month of October on social-media platforms to encourage others facing breast cancer.

Loved ones have deeply personal and unique ways to memorialize those who have died.

In some cases, a mother with young children may write letters to their children to be opened on special occasions like high school graduation or weddings. They may put together a scrapbook with memories of their time together as a family.

“These can provide something beautiful and tangible after they have died,” said Lisa Veglahn, vice president of education of Hospice Foundation for America. “The power of ritual can be very powerful. They can be comforting, even for a little child. Even just smaller memorials – like sharing stories or taking a favorite object – can have special meaning to us. It’s important to allow people to have that connection.”

After her mother passed away in 1993, after seven years of fighting breast cancer, Caity McCauley scattered her ashes at California’s Point Lobos State Natural Reserve – a gorgeous natural reserve park south of Carmel known for its spectacular beauty and the seals, sea lions, sea otters and migrating gray whales that gather there. Her mother lived in Carmel when she was young and often took Caity and her late brother, Kevin, there on foggy, summer picnics.

“It became her place for reflection and rebalance,” McCauley says. “So now when I visit Point Lobos, it’s like I’m visiting my mom. I walk every inch of trail there along the ocean, and I almost always spot something in nature that makes me wonder if she is trying to say hello.

"I love how full of life the park is, all the sensory input of the crashing surf and the incredible views, and I know that’s how she would want me to spend time thinking about her, is in the midst of all that amazing natural energy and life force.”

McCauley has taken her daughter, Robin, to Point Lobos on “my mom pilgrimages” a few times. “It was really cool because I see so much of my mom in Robin,” says McCauley.

For many people, jewelry can be a powerful keepsake.

“Having a memento you can wear around your neck or carry in your pocket is a linking object,” says the Hospice Foundation of America’s Veglahn. “Those tangible objects can be a comforting way to keep people close to their heart.”

In the case of Stephen Youngerman, he turned his wife’s ashes into jewelry. While working as a dental hygienist, Karen Youngerman commented on a patient’s beautiful necklace.

“She asked what it was and the patient said ‘That’s my husband.’” Youngerman said. “After that, my wife said ‘I want to be a gemstone.’”

His brother lived in Austin, Texas and told him about Eterneva. After Karen died, he sent her ashes to the company, ordering a pink diamond and working with Eterneva designers to create a necklace that reflected the spirit of his wife.

On the front of the necklace, beneath a diamond encircled with a heart, are the words “It’s magic.” These words are a tribute to way Youngerman signed the daily love letters he sent her when they were dating, as well as a nod to her magician father.

On the back, are the words “Carpe Diem,” (seize the day) as well as “Fuck Cancer.”

“I wear it pretty much 24-7, and she’s with me all the time,” he said. “It’s comforting and beautiful. And she goes with me on all of the walks.”

With the walks, he is carrying on the tradition started by his wife in 2005, two years after she was diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 43.

Karen Youngerman went to her doctor with pain in her chest and initially was told it was probably nothing to worry about. A mammogram was inconclusive, but a needle biopsy came back with the diagosis nobody wants to hear: it was cancer. The surgeons discovered a large tumor that had spread to her lymph nodes.

“It was the worst-case scenario,” Youngerman says.

At the time of her diagnosis, the Youngermans were preparing for their son’s Bar Mitzvah the following month. She asked her doctor if she could delay treatment until after the celebration. But because the cancer was aggressive, the answer was no. She did chemotherapy, radiation and more chemotherapy, and had to take a year off work. Youngerman took time off to take care of her and their three children.

Eight years later, after life had returned to normal, the cancer was back. She discovered she had a mutation of a BRCA gene, A small percentage of people –– one in 400, or 0.25 percent of the population –– carry mutated BRCA1 or BRCA2 genes, which increases the likelihood of developing both ovarian and breast cancer at a younger age.

The carrier of the mutated gene can also pass a gene mutation down to his or her offspring. Karen Youngerman opted to have a full hysterectomy in addition to another mastectomy.

Karen Youngerman began walking in the Susan G. Komen 3-Day walks in 2005, often wearing full camouflage in the spirit of fighting cancer, earning her and her friends the nickname the “Camo girls.”

Initially, Stephen Youngerman would drop her off at the starting line, cheering her on three days later at the finish line. To help find her amidst the crowd at the finish line, she would carry a red balloon adorned with “Mazel Tov.”

In 2011, when Karen was going through chemotherapy, Stephen took her place. The next year, they began walking together, and he has walked every year since.

In December 2016, the Youngman’s were planning a Panama Canal cruise to celebrate their 25th wedding anniversary. Shortly before the trip, they received the worst possible news. The cancer was back for a third time, and she got a Stage 4 diagnosis. The cruise would be their last trip.

Karen Youngerman participated in her last 3-day walk on a Sunday in 2017 in a wheelchair, wearing an oxygen mask, cheering on Stephen and the other walkers. She was dressed in camouflage.

“It wore her out, but it made her happy,” he recalled.

This year, he will participate in seven walks around the country. He admits it may be extreme, but he believes it makes a big statement. To participate walkers must raise $2.3K for each walk.

For Youngerman, these walks are emotional, empowering and inspiring, joining together with survivors and the families and friends of loved ones lost to breast cancer. A positive way to channel grief. Some people have multiple names on their back of people of people of survivors as well as those who have died from the disease.

‘It’s referred to as a “pink bubble,’” says Youngerman. “There’s a feeling of comradery and of love. Everyone who is there has given a lot of themselves to do something to help fight cancer.”

For two nights, participants camp with the 3-Day community, just like sleepaway camp for grown-ups.

“We’ll provide the tents—you make them home. Refuel and recharge for the journey ahead with meals, hot showers and massage chairs. This will be unlike any other camping experience you’ve seen.”

The event culminates in a Closing Ceremony at The Ford Center at The Star celebrating everything you accomplished, remembering those we have lost, and honoring those who are in the fight of their lives.

“She never gave up hope,” says Youngerman. “She was always out there helping somebody else. The 3-day walks were my wife’s happy place.”

Essential Facts About Breast Cancer

  • One in eight women in the United States will be diagnosed with breast cancer in her lifetime.
  • Breast cancer is the most commonly diagnosed cancer in women.
  • Breast cancer is the second leading cause of cancer death among women.
  • Each year it is estimated that over 252,710 women in the United States will be diagnosed with breast cancer and more than 40,500 will die.
  • Although breast cancer in men is rare, an estimated 2,470 men will be diagnosed with breast cancer and approximately 460 will die each year.
  • On average, every 2 minutes a woman is diagnosed with breast cancer and 1 woman will die of breast cancer every 13 minutes.Over 3.3 million breast cancer survivors are alive in the United States today.

Organizations Leading the Fight Against Breast Cancer

  • National Breast Cancer Organization: National Breast Cancer Foundation was founded in 1991 by breast cancer survivor, Janelle Hail. She was diagnosed with breast cancer in 1980 at the age of 34. NBCF helps women by funding targeted research
  • Susan G. Komen: In 1982, Nancy G. Brinker founded the foundation to honor her sister, Susan. The goal was end breast cancer forever. Started with 200 dollars and a shoebox full of potential donor names, the foundation has now grown into the world’s largest nonprofit source of funding for the fight against breast cancer. To date, the foundation has invested more than $2.9 billion in research, community health outreach, advocacy and programs in more than 60 countries. The foundation’s goal is to reduce the current number of breast cancer deaths by 50% in the U.S. by 2026.
  • The Susan G. Komen Race for the Cure Series is the world’s largest and most successful education and fundraising event for breast cancer ever created. The series of 5K runs and fitness walks raises funds and awareness for the breast cancer movement, celebrates breast cancer survivorship and honors those who have lost their battle with the disease.
  • Living Beyond Breast Cancer: LBBC provides programs and services to help people whose lives have been impacted by breast cancer. Our goal is to provide information, community and support that you can trust, is easy for you to access and respectful of you and your situation. All our resources are carefully and frequently reviewed by some of the country’s leading healthcare experts and informed by people living with breast cancer.
  • National Breast and Cervical Early Detection: The Center for Disease Control’s NBCCEDP provides low-income, uninsured, and underserved women access to timely cervical cancer and breast cancer screening and diagnostic services.

What Exactly Is Breast Cancer?

Breast cancer occurs when cells divide and grow without their normal control.Ductal carcinoma in situ (DCIS) occurs when the abnormal cells grow inside the milk ducts, but have not spread to nearby tissue. DCIS is a non-invasive breast cancer.Invasive breast cancer occurs when cancer cells spread to nearby tissue or other parts of the body.Invasive breast cancer that spreads beyond the breast and nearby lymph nodes to other parts of the body is called metastatic breast cancer.

American Cancer Society (ACS)

For those looking to make a direct impact, a donation to the American Cancer Society is a thoughtful way to honor someone affected by cancer. The ACS takes a comprehensive approach, funding crucial research while also providing direct patient support. This includes services like free rides to treatment, lodging near hospitals for patients and their families, and a 24/7 cancer helpline. According to the organization, every donation helps save lives by supporting these critical programs. When you give in memory of a loved one, you’re not only celebrating their life but also contributing to a future where others have the resources and support they need during their fight.

Stand Up To Cancer (SU2C)

Stand Up To Cancer operates with a unique and urgent mission: to accelerate the pace of cancer research. They bring together top scientists from different institutions to work in collaborative "Dream Teams," breaking down silos and encouraging innovation. This model is designed to get new therapies to patients faster. Their goal is to make every cancer patient a long-term survivor. By donating to SU2C in a loved one's name, you support groundbreaking research projects that are designed to find and treat cancers more effectively. It’s a powerful way to honor a memory by investing in the science that could lead to the next big breakthrough.

Cancer Research Institute (CRI)

The Cancer Research Institute is at the forefront of a revolutionary approach to treatment: immunotherapy. This field of medicine harnesses the body's own immune system to find and fight cancer cells. When you donate in memory of a loved one to CRI, your contribution directly funds the scientists who are developing and refining these powerful treatments. The institute believes in a future immune to cancer, and every gift helps them get closer to that goal. It’s a way to honor a personal journey while fueling scientific progress that has the potential to save countless lives.

How to Make a Donation in Someone's Memory

Making a donation in a loved one's name is a beautiful way to carry on their legacy and support a cause they cared about. It transforms grief into positive action, creating an impact that honors their memory. Most charitable organizations have made the process simple, allowing you to give a gift that is both meaningful to you and helpful to their mission. Whether you choose to create a public tribute or make a private contribution, these gestures provide comfort to the family and fuel important work in the fight against cancer.

Create an Online Tribute Page

Many organizations, including the Cancer Research Institute, allow you to create a special webpage to celebrate the life of someone you've lost. These tribute pages serve as a digital memorial where you can share photos, post stories, and write about what made your loved one so special. Friends and family can visit the page to make their own donations and leave messages of support. It becomes a collective space for remembrance, allowing a community to come together to honor an individual while contributing to a vital cause.

Send a Notification Card to the Family

When you make a memorial donation, most charities offer the option to send a personalized card to the family of the person you're honoring. This thoughtful gesture lets the family know that you’re thinking of them and that a gift has been made in their loved one's name. The American Cancer Society, for example, allows you to send an e-card or a physical card with your donation. It’s a simple but powerful way to express your sympathy and show your support during a difficult time, without disclosing the amount of your donation.

Other Ways to Donate

Beyond a one-time online gift, there are several other ways to contribute that might better suit your preferences or financial situation. Many charities welcome donations by mail or phone, and you can often set up a recurring monthly gift to provide steady, predictable support for long-term research. For those interested in making a different kind of impact, many organizations also accept non-cash donations. Unique contributions like stocks, bonds, or even real estate can be incredibly helpful to a charity and may also offer significant tax benefits for you. If you're considering a gift of this nature, it's a good idea to speak with the charity's development office and a financial advisor.

The Impact and Trustworthiness of Your Donation

When you donate in memory of a loved one, you want to be sure your contribution is making a real difference. It’s about more than just giving money; it’s about honoring a legacy by fueling progress and supporting others. Understanding how your donation is used and choosing a reputable organization are key steps in making your tribute as impactful as possible. This ensures your gesture of remembrance contributes effectively to the fight against cancer, providing both immediate help and hope for the future.

How Donations Fuel Research

While helping people access quality care today is essential, research is the engine that drives future progress. As Kimberly A. Sabelko, Ph.D., of Susan G. Komen notes, research is "critical for developing new, more effective treatments." Your donation helps fund the labs, clinical trials, and brilliant scientists working to understand the complexities of cancer. Every dollar brings us one step closer to better diagnostic tools, personalized therapies, and, ultimately, cures. It’s an investment in a future where fewer families have to experience the loss of a loved one to this disease.

Ensuring Your Contribution is Used Effectively

Donating in someone's name is a profound way to show respect for their journey and contribute to the fight against cancer. To ensure your gift has the greatest possible impact, it’s wise to do a little research before you give. Before making a donation, you can verify an organization's credibility through independent charity evaluators like Charity Navigator or GuideStar. These websites provide detailed information on a charity's financial health, accountability, and transparency. Taking a few minutes to check these ratings can give you peace of mind, knowing that your contribution will be used responsibly and effectively to support the mission you care about.

Tax Benefits of Charitable Giving

Beyond the emotional and societal benefits, your generosity can also have financial advantages. In the United States, donations made to qualified charitable organizations are typically tax-deductible. This means that when you file your taxes, you may be able to deduct the amount of your contribution, which could lower your overall tax bill. Be sure to keep the receipt from your donation and consult with a tax professional to understand how charitable giving can fit into your financial planning.

Additional Support and Resources

Supporting the fight against cancer extends beyond individual donations. Many opportunities exist within workplaces and communities to amplify your impact and create a network of support for those affected by the disease. These programs make it easier for people to get involved and contribute in ways that are both convenient and powerful, fostering a collective effort to make a difference.

Employer Matching Gift Programs

One of the easiest ways to increase the impact of your donation is through an employer matching gift program. Many companies will match their employees' charitable contributions, sometimes dollar-for-dollar or even more. This means your $50 donation could instantly become $100 or more for the charity. Check with your human resources department to see if your company offers a matching gift program and learn how to submit your donation for a match. It’s a simple step that can double your tribute's power.

Workplace Partnerships

Companies and workplaces can also form direct partnerships with organizations like the American Cancer Society to support employees affected by cancer. These partnerships can involve company-wide fundraising campaigns, volunteer days, or educational programs that raise awareness. This creates a supportive corporate culture where employees feel they are not alone in their fight and can easily contribute to a cause that affects so many of their colleagues and their families.

Resources for Funeral Directors

Funeral directors can be an invaluable resource for families wishing to honor a loved one through charitable giving. They can help you include "in lieu of flowers" donation requests in an obituary and may have information on reputable local and national cancer charities. By providing this guidance, they can simplify the process for grieving families, making it easier to establish a memorial fund that directs the generosity of friends and family toward a meaningful cause.

Creating a Lasting, Personal Tribute

While financial contributions are vital for funding research and patient care, honoring a loved one is a deeply personal act. For many, the desire to keep a memory alive goes beyond a one-time donation. It involves creating a lasting tribute that can be seen, touched, and felt every day. This kind of personal memorial serves as a constant, comforting reminder of the love and the unique bond you shared, keeping their story and spirit close to your heart.

Beyond Financial Donations

Honoring a legacy can take many forms, and the most meaningful tributes are often those that reflect the unique personality and spirit of the person you've lost. It could be planting a tree in their favorite park, completing a project they were passionate about, or simply sharing their stories with others. These acts of remembrance are not about grand gestures but about finding a personal way to keep their memory integrated into your life, ensuring their impact continues to be felt.

Tangible Memorials to Keep Them Close

For many, creating a tangible, personal memorial provides a unique source of comfort. While donations support a greater cause, a physical keepsake offers a way to keep a loved one's memory close every day. Some find healing when they transform a part of their loved one, like ashes or hair, into a beautiful and permanent memorial diamond. This creates an enduring reminder of their life and legacy that can be held, worn, and passed down through generations, keeping their story bright and present.

Frequently Asked Questions

How do I choose the right cancer charity for my donation? Choosing a charity is a personal decision. A good place to start is by thinking about what mattered most to your loved one. Were they passionate about scientific breakthroughs, or did they find comfort in community support programs? Some organizations focus heavily on funding innovative research, while others provide direct aid to patients and their families. You can also use independent websites like Charity Navigator to review an organization's financial health and transparency, which can give you confidence that your tribute will be used effectively.

What are some meaningful ways to honor someone without making a financial donation? Honoring someone's memory is about intention, not money. You can carry on their legacy through action. Consider participating in a fundraising walk or run, volunteering your time for a cause they supported, or simply sharing their story with others to raise awareness. These acts of service and remembrance are powerful tributes that celebrate the life they lived and the impact they had on you.

How can I create a tribute that feels more personal and lasting? While donations support a wider cause, a personal tribute is something you can connect with daily. This can be as simple as planting a tree in their favorite park or creating a scrapbook of your favorite memories together. For a more tangible connection, some people find comfort in creating a physical keepsake, like turning ashes or hair into a piece of memorial jewelry. The goal is to create a beautiful, lasting reminder that keeps their spirit and story close to you.

Is it okay to ask for donations instead of flowers at a funeral? Absolutely. It is a very common and thoughtful way to honor someone. Many families find it meaningful to direct the support of friends and family toward a cause their loved one cared about. You can include a simple phrase like, "In lieu of flowers, please consider a donation to [Charity Name]" in the obituary. Your funeral director can also help you with the specific wording and details for setting this up.

How can I be sure my donation is actually making a difference? It's smart to want your contribution to have a real impact. Reputable charities are transparent about how they use their funds and are proud to share their accomplishments. Before giving, you can look at their website for annual reports or impact stories. These documents often break down how much money goes toward research, patient services, and administrative costs, giving you a clear picture of how your tribute is helping others.

Key Takeaways

  • Transform grief into a positive tribute: Find a personal way to honor their memory, whether through participating in an awareness walk, donating to a cause they loved, or creating a unique keepsake.
  • Make your remembrance count: Support causes that matter by making a memorial donation to a reputable charity; this is a powerful way to contribute to research and patient support, turning a personal loss into hope for others.
  • Keep their story close: A physical memento provides a lasting, personal connection, as keepsakes like memorial jewelry offer a daily source of comfort and a way to carry your loved one's story with you.

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